Twentyeight.

Its been so long, I've forgot alll about you.

Here is what goes on in my world at night:

Dream:

Well, I'm around say my upper 20s, and I have 2 kids, ones a boy and I think the other one is a girl. I have no idea where I was at and I was hold a german shepard, full grown, and it was changing from old to young. Then everything was changing, i was somewhere new and i was looking for my kids and I found them watching this like mini portable television and I guess the television new I was there and it freaked out yelling "SHES WATCHING" and I tried pretending I dropped something but then I tried talking to my son about it and I woke up bout was able to fall back asleep into it and I missed the talk part and all I know is he didn't like what the television was telling him. So I was trying to find the people behind whatever was going on with my kids. ( oh BTW I knew I was sleeping, so I was like "guiding myself in my own dream) I came up to this building and it was so weird, it was half underwater, but there was no actual level of water. So I was venturing through trying to find out where to go( not really sure where I was going) and I had to go through some stairs that were underwater and I was freaking out about my phone getting wet(lol) And this guy gave me his cucumber bag(lol) I felt watched the whole time. And i was going down these underwater stairs till I came into some large room, kinda like a bussiness office with no one in it and I knew something bad would happen if i stayed so I turned around to leave before they catched me( not sure what would happen) and the stairs changed into some trap like thing and I couldn't find my way out, there were trick doors and missing things and I woke myself up out of me actually fearing what would happen if I couldn't find my way out.

Twentyseven.

I HAVNT POSTED ONE IN MAY YET.
Oh man.

I dunno what to write.
I just took a sleeping pill and a xanex, how the hell do you spell that? :P
I'm kinda outta it. Lol. Stupid druggie. Mom sad it will work. I think it is.






Theses photos make me cry. I miss my sugar baby :(
I wish I could just take her back.
Silly 20 pound cat.

Twentyfive.

Its been long, right?
I've lost track of time.


Tomorrow is the last day of April.
Meaning its almost May.
Meaning school is about out.
My 10th year out, hopefully my only 10th year :P.
So that means there's 2 years left of High school. Thennnn I go out into the "real world".
Its kinda scary. Yet I'm excited.
So where do I go from there? College? Hair school? :D
Oh the choices.
I'll be 16 in 26 days.
I want to get a summer job. Kinda hard. :P
but I will try!
Now just thinking about it.
I've had 7 homes in my life.
No, 8.
But I don't really count my dads as a "home".
So, I'm random.
My mom always ask the question "what is normal anyways?"
Its kinda depressing.
I have to memorize a paragraph for English and say it in front on class.
I'm going to screw up so bad.
sooooooooososososooooo bad.
Ever heard of the band Flogging Molly?
They are the best live, cause you cant help but get involved with the crowd.
Not the same by yourself though.
ramblerambleramble.
I want to know more about YOUR life. :]
The best music to get me thinking is anything by the Gorillaz.
Sooo, that swine flu going around.
I think people are over reacting.
its 10:03PM and mother is not home!
I think memory is one of the best things out there.
The thought of how the whole human body works creeps me outtt.
I love touching veins.

Take me to a abandoned amusement park :D



Anyone fancy a pair of these?

twentyfour.

Twentythree.

Google is quite entertaining.
Have fun with google and click these sites:


1) Don't feel like googling yourself, well: Let me google that for you!

2) Didn't google that question of yours?: Just fucking google it!

3)Uhh: Google fight!

4) Google the closest thing to God himself?: The church of Google

5)Google: April fools

6) What does google think of you?: Googlism

This is what google thinks of me:
marisa is cool
marisa is a rock star
marisa is in london
marisa is one that has relatively stable water levels
marisa is sold to aquarists but eats almost every vegetation
marisa is doing so well i just want other parents to know that there is hope even on the darkest of days and there are people out there who know what you are
marisa is a hot fuck
marisa is a slight japanese woman in her late thirties
marisa is a loser
marisa is gorgeous
marisa is happy to have the job that allows her to raise her son by herself without the illegal money her deceased spouse earned
marisa is on a steroid that keeps the swelling around her brain
marisa is pleased to provide you with a personal wedding consultant to guide you through your wedding adventure
marisa is a important part of me that should be respected and most of all enjoyed
marisa is off to a great start
marisa is extremely talented and versatile
marisa is terrified for his life
marisa is helping other young latinas become leaders in their communities
marisa is scared to check out books
marisa is being fed
marisa is a graduate of bellaire high school
marisa is slated to appear as a voice on the simpsons this coming season
marisa is of course attracted to grigory
marisa is a 12" latino toddler with soft stuffed body
marisa is loading the refrigerators with bottles of beer and carlos comes out of the back room carrying a metal box with the previous night's receipts in it.

alrighty then.

7) Look into the circle: Google will know

8) Feeling alil backwards?: Elgoog




What a way to spend my Friday night right?
I wouldn't hate coming to my dads as much if I could actually go out.
All I do is sit on my lazy ass and talk on the internet.
I'm so lonely D:

What is it? 7 weeks of school left?
I feel like I wont fail this quarter. Only have to make up a credit somehow the next 2 years.
I want a summer job extremely bad.
Nobody wants a 16 yearold freak with metal in their face and colored hair though. Lol.
Maybe, just maybe I'll get lucky.

Thanks to Christy I read fmylife.com everyday. Lol.

Can you believe this is real? I've never wanted to drive on a bridge more in my life then now.
The structure is 885 feet above the Tarn River valley in southern France.

Twentytwo.

SO!
Let me tell you bout me day!


1st) I got married:

Then I ate here:

Then used the restroom where I used this: (that is my own hairy arm and hand)

Then I went out and purchased this:

Then I HAD to get a copy of this:

Yeah, Life is good :]

Okay okay
Really my day was just filled with tornadoes
And dark skys
Which was perfect :D

Twentyone.

Dreamsdreamsdreams.
I had 2 very clear dreams this morning, the only confusing part is if they were connected. The way I remember seeing it was right after the other as if they were, but.. they couldn't have been. Here, read and you'll see :P

Dream #1:
I got up for school and mom was going to drive me, she said we were leaving at 8. The problem was I couldn't get ready. It was weird. I tried and I was getting frustrated and I just couldn't get ready. Before I knew it it was 8:13, 8:29, 8:54. I was crying and I just c o u l d n' t.

Dream #2:
This one is alil more personal, but I'll tell it anyways :P
It was night/early morning. I was trying to sleep. Tony and Ian were sleeping over. Mom and Tony are arguing, like they normally do, but Ian was getting worked up and scared again that it might turn into something bigger. I get protective over Ian and when he gets involved I get very angry. So I go out to where hes sleeping and try to calm him down, and their fighting gets alil louder and I just had enough. I slam moms door open and I start pretty much screaming at Tony, alil at my mom too. I just couldn't stop yelling at him. I remembering thinking I need to stop, but I kept going. I started crying pretty much at the beginning and you sometimes barely make out what I was saying. And they freaking just sat their staring at me like I'm fucking insane, even looked alil annoyed. Tony had this sarcastic face like he was pleased what hes done to me, mom looked like she didn't care, rather just go to bed already. I keep yelling, my throat started to hurt, but I didn't care. I kept going until my legs collasped on me and I fell to my knees and held my self up with my hands. I stayed like that for a good 10 minutes crying. They just sat there, like they were bored. I got up and I left like nothing happened, because thats how they made it feel. I've never felt so bad. I woke up shaken, crying, and confused cause it seemed soooo realll.